In review

My bloglines account monitors something like 70 blogs right now. I often click on the "real" blog also, not just the bloglines, but the bloglines lets me easily see who's updated.

But every so often, bloglines does this funky thing where it refreshes a bunch of blogs that weren't really updated. So I may be reading bloglines and see that someone got a previo when in fact I know their child has been home for many months. It looks like a new post, but it's really just some automatic refresher of an old post.

Today bloglines refreshed most of Angel's old blog. I scrolled through the whole thing, backward. Zoe comes home, they get out of PGN, summer visit. They hired AS around the same time I did. They got a previo, in PGN, pre-approval.

They got DNA authorization on March 29. The same day I was told mine was a lie. And Angel apologized to me for her good news. How horrible for her, that her joy had to be tempered with an apology for my situation. I'm sorry, Angel. I'm sorry things were so bad for me that you couldn't fully enjoy your success.

I knew it was around that same time, the DNA authorization situation. At the time, it made sense. We had started around the same time, had progressed (or not) at the same rate, and finally had some answers around the same time (even if my answers were bad, at least they were finally some answers). It made my situation more believable, in my warped AND TRUSTING waiting-parent mind.

I'm so desperately searching for some kind of answer as to WHY this happened to ME. And now, seeing that there's the additional DNA test because the embassy must feel enough babies are being switched to warrant this new test (although I've only heard of two baby-switching cases, I have to believe it's a significant concern to implement this new test) I'm reminded of my bad apple. AppleS. Agency, facilitator, attorney who did the signing. And the agency has several people who work there, on the payroll (director and her husband are listed on the 990, as is director's "best" friend). And the facilitator has an assistant, since he's not allowed to actually WORK so he has someone else's name to attach. And that attorney, he's nothing more than a paid signature. He gets PAID, out of the money I THOUGHT was going towards foster care and medical exams (and vaccinations) and adoption-related paperwork.

On two cedulas

After finding out that I did indeed meet Thanassis in person during my visit trip in February 2006, I've been thinking about the other issues during my nightmare that were never fully resolved. Mostly, the two cedulas.

I keep going back, in my mind, to WHY she had two cedulas. I did get that one e-mail after the first time the bmom went to explain her situation at PGN, saying that she got the second cedula from the second city because that would make her eligible for food vouchers. I don't really understand that. My understanding was, there are no such things as food vouchers in Guatemala because they don't have anything similar to our welfare system. But I don't know everything (FAR from everything!), and I definitely don't know about the government programs in Guatemala. When I have a little time (i.e., after the Dissertation), I'll look into it. Giving her the benefit of the doubt, maybe some provinces have welfare-type programs but it's not a federal government thing. At any rate, I did accept that reasoning at the time.

Going back even further, when I first was told about the two cedula situation, I asked around on some forums what that would mean. Everyone told me that there's a good chance one was fake. It was explained to me by more than one person that a bmom may obtain a second cedula because she was married, and she knows she can't relinquish to the US if she were married because then the child won't fit the US definition of an adoptable orphan. (Reference needed, it's somewhere on the USCIS site, I'm not looking for it now so you'll have to believe me. If you don't believe me, leave a comment and I'll be sure to find it for you and link to it. Ugh, such dissertation-brain.) When I asked the agency about that possibility, I was told they didn't think it was true about this bmom. After all, the explanation read, it's common for people to have more than one cedula, so if the bmom said she only ever had one cedula that would have been a bigger red flag.

Um, wait a second. The day BEFORE that comment, AS I was being told about the existence of the two cedulas, I was told by the agency that they didn't REALIZE there were two cedulas. I mean, how could they have realized that, considering the girls were registered under different cedulas and the files were completely separated. It did make sense that the agency wouldn't have realized one woman / two cedulas if they were separated. But if it were the same facilitator and it was less than one month apart, HOW did he not realize it? That was definitely a question, although I thought it was the same lawyer as I had no idea about the facilitator existence. (I still didn't know I HAD a facilitator, I thought it was just the attorney since that's all who was ever mentioned to me!) I remember talking to Vicki about the two cedulas, not understanding if the agency DID or DID NOT know there were two cedulas. Day one, I was told they didn't know at all there were two cedulas, day two I was told they had always known there were two cedulas and that's how they knew the bmom wasn't lying. I was SO DUMB to believe the agency, that they were telling the truth and were just confused about what they said originally. STUPID STUPID me. I should have questioned more. It wouldn't have mattered, as my case was already over anyway because the cedula issues couldn't have been worked out by that point and the agency wouldn't have given me a new referral even then. But if I questioned, I wouldn't have waited three more months until I found out about the banned facilitator.

I just found this site that discussed falsified cedulas. I didn't even realize it was a possibility! But apparently, not only is it highly possible that cedulas are falsified, but it's even EASY. The following comment was posted TWENTY-THREE DAYS before I was told The Lie:
"also, it's easy to get a fraudulent cedula ... i heard this from a lawyer who told me before he accepts a BM he goes in person to check the records and make sure it's a valid cedula."

It's EASY?? Really? And there's a way to go and check that it's a valid cedula before the bmom is accepted? Before a match is made, this could have been checked? Hmmmm..........

The absolute WORST part about having this experience is knowing my story, the idea that Ingrid's bmom's documents were falsified, is just adding to the extra scrutiny that other cases have to face. If it's true that Thanassis falsified her cedula, that's even MORE reason he should rot. I hired an agency without getting enough feedback (although I still contend there weren't the same number of negative feedback available when I started compared to now), but that "licensed agency" chose to work with someone they knew had been banned for SIX MONTHS before I got my referral. If that agency didn't work with him, if NO agency worked with him, there wouldn't HAVE to be the scrutiny that other poor waiting parents are facing, there wouldn't have to be the new (alleged) DNA test, there wouldn't have to be the uncertainty in PGN.

I'm going to have to compile a list of ALL the lies. Cause I used to think The Lie was about DNA authorization. Now, I think that was just one lie to cover up much bigger lieS. That's plural.